As an introvert, one thing I find the most repellant about society is the concept of parties.
It’s like slapping someone across the face and saying “if you want to be accepted into this little clique of ours, you will come to this party and be social!” to someone who knows more about The Lord of The Rings series than being “social”.
If you don’t go to the party and/or aren’t invited (happens to me at work a lot. I’m only bothered I don’t get the opportunity to decline.), you’re suddenly a strange duckling that will not get inside jokes, regular jokes in general, or current events that are the gossip of our generation. In my case, it seems there was an aura of “loser” that was created around me – partially acquired by my lame jokes and pathetic attempts at puns.
Did a skunk spray me? Did I forget to put on deodorant? No, and no; I simply made it known that I do not feel comfortable at parties. That’s not a bad thing, either. More friends means more problems, more people you have to be loyal to, more people you have to please, more, more, more, more…
I am perfectly happy being in my comfy space bubble with my way-too-casual TeeFury shirts and sweats, ice cream in one hand and a large spoon in the other, and a laptop on my (you guessed it) lap.
However, there is a saying I heard that applies: “Just because I like being alone doesn’t mean I like being lonely.”
It is with a reluctant heart I admit that is true. No one likes to be lonely, we all have people we love to be around, even if it’s just one. Or a cat. Maybe. Not talking about myself at all.
We like quiet. We like peace. We also like wrapping ourselves in blankets and crawling around like a caterpillar. Sometimes we like to be with people who make us laugh, but at the end of the day, we need to make sure our mental battery is in good condition. Anything below 30% starts to get risky. About 48% for me.
Disclaimer: we are all different, ignore me if I generalize introverts to the extreme
Another thing we’re good at is thinking extravagantly more than talking. Not saying this is only seen in introverts, but just something I feel is necessary to point out (I mean the main conversation IS about being social). In my case, I will be too shy to tell someone if I am uncomfortable, but my body language will scream just that. I’ll make awkward conversation like “so… this weather,” and laugh at all the wrong times because I honestly have no idea to react to someone telling me new information.
Person: “Did you hear that SoAndSo Brand is going out of business?”
Me: “Good, I didn’t like them anyway.” (guessing I have a 50/50 chance to say the right response)
Person: “Well……. I liked their stuff…….”
Me: “Oh.. Well I mean there was this one thing that I liked, it had this thing that I can’t really remember with this thing I also don’t remember. It was a long time ago.” (Trying to sew the edges I have torn)
Person: “Yeah………..” (Awkward silence ensues until they miraculously find someone they know and leave me to stand in awkward peace)
In fact, just a few days ago, I discovered a coworker to be gay/bisexual.
Girl: “Yeah, so I’m going on a trip to see an old friend.”
Me: “Oh fun, have you known each other long? And where are you going?”
Girl: “She lives in Spokane; we used to date.”
Me: “Huh…. I love Spokane.”
Now I know that doesn’t suit it justice, but I was SO proud of myself for not appearing surprised my coworker delves into the area of vajayjay. She didn’t seem too put off, so my tactic must have worked. Either that or she thought I was so funny (unlikely) that she let it go.
Anyway, I’m tired, so I’m going to wrap it up. If you don’t want to go to parties, don’t go. Don’t feel pressured to go, because your internet friends will be here to entertain you more than those strangers ever could. Also, parties = drinks = bad decisions. Not always, but often enough.
This is Tae, good day and good night.